This Mommy Runs on Caffeine

This Mommy Runs on Caffeine

February 14, 2011

Will You Be My Anti-Valentine?

I'm going to freely admit that today is not one of my favorite 'holidays' of the year. And by holiday I mean that in the sense that it has earned its own printed day on the calendar, not a day free from work. It has weaseled it's way into our lives commercially, setting up false expectations forcing people to purchase gifts simply because the masses do and it's socially unacceptable to buck the trend. In this case, you’ll be a cheap, forgetful bastard/ beyotch sleeping in the other room if you boycott February 14th and forget to bring ‘everybody’ else in on the plan.
   I'm not a hater of all things red and heart shaped, I just take slight to commercialism (now as for pink and heart-shaped, that's an entirely different story!).  Take for example; my poor mom was in a fit because she couldn't afford to get K something for Valentine's Day. (Now Mom, you've seen her playroom and nursery- do you really think that she wants for much?) So she baked us cute little cookies with fluffy sugary frosting- yummy and quite perfect. Those are going to be one of the best presents ever. Besides I bought her a boose (K's word for balloon) and said it was from Mammas BB.
    My dislike of the V-Day goes way back to even grade school. Third, fourth and fifth grade kids are just plain mean- and even more so if you happen to be smart and have red hair. I despised the parties and knowing that I was going to get less stupid cartoon cards..... my mommy was smart and instilled in me values of acceptance and fairness and made me give one to all of the little kids- even the ones that picked their noses. To this day I shudder when I see boxes of kiddie Valentines! (Hope that passes before K hits preschool!)  More so, I also always hated seeing my mom unhappy because her then-husband was selfish and never showered her with flowers and fluffy animals or candy. The lack of effort was appalling- not even a card. (The bare minimum!)
    In high school my dislike grew- not because I didn’t have boyfriends to bestow upon me the commercial treats, but because I hated all of the catty one-upmanship of the next day. Um, yeah, I know that you got two dozen roses and I just got three single roses but your boyfriend also was seen getting friendly with Olga just two days ago- yep, that’s true love! I know a handful of people who are still originally together since high school (the rest have swapped!) and I give them props- Valentine’s Day or not! I just found that instead of it making you all lovey and sentimental, it instead made you feel quite the opposite.
     And in college…. I wrote an editorial for my Junior College paper about how wrong it is for the commercial world to make you feel like crap because you’re single. At the time I was newly separated and my beloved Dalmatian was my Valentine- we dined on McD’s cheeseburgers and Boone’s Farm- obviously memorable even that long ago. Fifteen years ago that was progressive- now it’s just called anti-valentinism and is a great reason to go to the bar with your friends and celebrate Sex-in-the-City style.
     It's just a date on the calendar, much like January or June 14th- the world doesn't stop because cupid is amongst us.  Trust me, he wasn't at either of the funerals that I've been to in recent years on....yep, February 14th.....
     Consider if Hallmark created cards in the true origination of the day: A Roman priest- Saint Valentine- whom secretly married couples despite Claudius II’s outlawing marriage (Hmm… sounds like a current event) was condemned and beaten to death with clubs and beheaded. He suffered martyrdom on the 14th day of February, 270AD. Those would be lovely graphics, wouldn’t they?
     Our family isn’t entirely boycotting the day- I received a sweet text message this morning and we purchased together a beautiful dozen roses partly because they were part of a Safeway promotion; little Miss K got two Valentine- hemed boose’s from the $ store and there will be cards exchanged but no over-the-top gifts. I’d rather have those for no reason at all. We usually don’t do dinner out either as pricey boring menus with sub par service isn't worth celbrating (thanks anyways Leah for the offer to watch K- much appreciated!) but there’s an IHOP BOGO coupon out today that is mighty appealing. But I’m actually looking forward a Valentine’s family-style: cooking the cranberry pork chops together from the cookbook that J gave to me as a special, heartfelt Christmas present and enjoying a glass of red wine with a chick-flick after our very best forever-Valentine goes to bed.

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