Operation Yard Sale Complete! (And Some Advice for You!)

We had our annual purging yard sale this past weekend.  I love the idea of having someone pay you to take away your stuff!  It is a shit TON of work but worth it in the end when you rid your house of items that you no longer need and get to make a bit of money in the process! I also love GOING to yard sales and I have my pet peeves so I try to be a mindful seller as well.  Yard sales are for bargain hunting for sure. (I decorated the entry way of our house in garage sale chic with the help of a few cans of spray paint and some imagination for under $30.) 

My BFF, Leah, is my yard sale companion, in addition to my begrudging hubby we usually make a good tag team. You will want more than one person to (as in you plus one or two!) at your sale.  It will get CROWDED at times- usually between 8 and 9:30.

So my first tip is preparation in the signage and in the merchandising.  You can't expect to put up signs scribbled on notebook paper in BIC pen (or paper plates with SALE and an itty bitty arrow on them) and drive traffic to your sale.  Furthermore, throwing out everything on the driveway in one pile is a no-no.  

Another note about signs....  Please, please, take the time to take down your signs. It’s not only inconsiderate to your ‘customers’ that try to find you, but it’s also good for Mother Nature. 

One thing that I hear regularly hear at our sales is “Great Signs!” They are large (18 x 24)  DOUBLE sided signs, on ground stakes with very large red print that says YARD SALE with an equally impressive arrow directing the way. I make them on the computer (four sheets of paper per sign) and tape them onto what I’ll call campaign signs (you know the ones that you see along the road during election season?)- and then they can be shoved into the ground. I've had these for years and they are reused and even borrowed for acquaintance's sales.

Remember, you have about three seconds to catch a passers-by attention and make them turn the car in your direction. It’s not necessary to put the time and date, as long as you put them up and take them down (appoint a family member to help) when your sale is going on; nor should you try to list items in 8-pt font. (If you want to list items, try craigslist- that’s another good way to advertise or find yard sales!)  I can guarantee that if you take the care into making good, attention catching signs, you will actually make more money. Our sale this year netted a fair amount for our efforts, we average about $500 with the highest price point was about $50. 

My other 'expert' advice? 

• Take a few weeks to plan your sale to give you time to clean, mark and sort your items- and to make the signs too. Clean and Marking are operable words here.  Although I didn't mark 2/3 of the stuff due to time constraints, I marked the items I wasn't flexible on the price about $5 to $10 more than I wanted.  The rest I had an idea somewhere between $1 and up.
• Let your friends 'shop' the night before!  This is a great 'excuse' to get some last minute help, but also give them a good deal on things that are perfect for them.  My friend Michelle walked away with two huge bags of clothes for $30!
• Make good signs- yes, this is the third time I've said it, but.... at least get the poster board from the dollar store and make large letters on it! You can affix it to a box weighted with rocks to keep it standing!
• Post your Sale on Craigslist earlier in the week with highlights and then edit it again the night before to appear for the sale day.  Don't forget to remove the ad once your sale is over.
• People will shoplift at your sale.  It's a sad fact but it will happen.  We post a person at each end of the driveway to deter that and they have to pay to get to their car. 
• If you want to get really organized, while "spring" (or winter/ fall, etc) cleaning, and you come across an item that you don't want, after inspecting it for defects- slap a price sticker on it and throw it in the Garage Sale box tucked away in a hiding spot!
• Ask your neighbors, friends or family if they would like to participate. The more wares at your sale, the better. Also, they can bring tables (see below).  Multi-family sales always draw a crowd.
• They will come, and they will buy, especially if they don’t have to bend down to look! Borrow as many portable tables and shelves as you can. I attribute the success of our sales to the fact that nearly everything was on a table, clean (if you pick it up and say, ewwwww, so will someone else!) and (most) clearly marked. The fact that people didn't have to rummage and bend down will make them look longer!
• Don’t forget to get change- I usually go with $70 to start, with $1's, $5's and $10's and a bunch of quarters.   You will have many people that will give you a $20 for $3 worth of stuff!  Carry your change in a purse and put larger bills in the house when you can.  A Cash drop for those of you that have ever worked retail)
• Make a sign at check-out that says " CASH ONLY" and “All Sales Final”
• Have paper and plastic grocery bags on hand to wrap fragile items and to bag peoples purchases. Offer them bags and they will fill them- more money for you and less to haul away later.
• Purchase the little priced dot stickers at the dollar store and use them in a very visible spot on the item.  It will save you from having to answer “How Much?” 500 times in one day. If you priced it higher than someone wants to pay, they’ll generally ask if you’ll take X amount. Masking Tape and sharpies work well too.  (I skipped this cardinal rule and although I may have suffered from sales from it, I was crazy busy with life to do pricing justice.)  I just knew in general what I wanted for an item in ADVANCE.
• See above? If the time has to be picked up with two hands, a good rule of thumb is to use a larger sticker or affix a piece of paper. Also, be aware of where you stick pricing stickers- make sure you won't ruin the item
• Sell in multiples for better value- books, CD’s, clothing. I love sales where I can find three paperback books for $1 or fill a bag with clothes for $5.  Get creative with your marketing to attract a sale- group items together- like "new parent's must haves," "college student's dorm room"
• Mark items in multiples of 25 cents- it will be easier to make change.
• Have an extension cord handy to test out electrical appliances and hook up your radio for musical ambiance
• If you think you can get more for an item individually, either consign or Craigslist it by itself. People go to sales wanting a deal and expect to pay about 20% at most to retail value.
• Be prepared to haggle and deal.  It's an art form.  People will also low-ball you and you need to decide in advance what your strategy is.  I have had buyers offer me $3 for an item marked $20- that's a stretch.... I'll take $17.... you'll get the idea once your sale begins
• What to price items:
• Shoes- $2 to $5 depending on wear and brand
• Baby Clothing- name brand (Gymboree, GAP, etc.) $1 to $3 depending on quality.  I did $1 for each piece and it went flying off the tables.  
• Adult Clothing- .50c to $3, Denim $5- it's a crap shoot-  I did fill a bag for $5 and sold quite a bit
• Baby Equipment- check to ensure it's not recalled, has all the parts and sell for about 30% of retail. (Play Yards $20, Blankets $2, Strollers- $20, etc.)  
• Toys- $2- $5 depending on items, Board games and puzzles should be closer to $1- they are a hard sell but will if priced right (people are afraid of missing pieces)
• Books- Hardbacks for $1 each, Soft, 3/$1, Kids books .75c
• CD's/DVDs- $1 to $2
• Home Decor- under $10
• Kitchen Stuff- under $5
• Appliances- check retail prices and CL and price accordingly
• people don't care what the sentimental value is to you, if you can't bear to part with it, don't put it in the sale.
• if you think you can get more elsewhere, sell it there but the whole point of the sale is to watch it walk away.
• Don't put the shit back in your house once you are done! 
• I was pressed for time this sale and paid someone to clean and haul away the items at the end.  BEST. MONEY. SPENT.  I'd already spent enough time getting ready for it, and it prevented me from thinking I needed to keep the items.  They have already been setting out of view for months, no need to bring it back inside!
• Be respectful of your neighbors and post no parking signs- I posted no parking signs in front of my two closest neighbors to avoid having cars stop in the middle of my sale blocking the view of 'driver's-by' and also for noise.  Starting your sale at dawn is mean for your neighbors.  It's their weekend too!
• Check your HOA and city rules for sign posting and sale-hosting laws.  Some cities don't allow sign posting on their landmarks or more than one sale per year, etc.

Phew! It's a lot of advice but I hope it will help you have an incredibly successful sale!

So, I Got a New "Job"......

Today is day three of my new job. Like most employees experience at their first week of work, it’s hard to decide what to wear, it’s anxiety-ridden, stressful and I don’t really get to talk to my boss or co-workers until the end of the day. My new job, for the time being, is Stay-at-Home Mom (SAHM).
      If you do the math, the time on “the job” might not be adding up; after all MiniMe is actually 3-1/2. It’s just that last Friday was the final day at a job that I’ve held for a quarter of my life. I started there just a few days after graduating from college and have worked there for the past 11 years; and now here I am. This change wasn’t a decision that I made on my own, I’ve joined the ranks of many Americans who have been downsized- my position was eliminated.
      I am terribly sad about that chapter of my life ending. When you hear people talk about loving their jobs, well, I was one of them. I mean I really, really, really LOVED my job, it was a huge part of who I was. I put every ounce of effort into it and my reward was…. Well, this and it truly is bittersweet.
Before I actually had MiniMe, we didn’t even discuss me staying home with her- I wanted to work, in fact I needed to work- not just for the money, but for the self-fulfillment and personal enrichment. I felt like a well-rounded person working AND being a mom (yet, I always tried to find better work/life balance- go figure?!!!?) We also were blessed that our arrangements for daycare were not only free, but with Anti-Latte’s mom, so Mini was in the loving care of her grandma every day. And this, is why I didn’t feel guilty for working- well, once or twice when she was sick… but how lucky were we?
      She will still spend many days at her grandma’s house for several reasons- she gets to see her cousins every other day, I still have some other commitments that will necessitate daycare as well as the fact that Grandma K is a recent widow and MiniMe is a great diversion and excellent therapy. I also don’t want to completely interrupt her schedule should I be fortunate enough to find my next wonderful job sooner rather than later. Also, we will be enrolling her into pre-school this Spring. Yeah, you’re thinking, “She’s not a real SAHM.” You’re right; I have no clue what I am. I’m stuck in emotional limbo of being completely devastated about being laid off to feeling some excitement to getting to spend more time with my family. How cool is it that for the first time since I was 12, I don’t have a work commitment? How sad is it that I don’t have a work commitment? How awesome is it that I can stay at home with my child? How freaked out am I about staying home with my child? Will I get bored? Will we all still like each other at the end of the day? (Oh, c’mon- you’ve experienced those weekends where you couldn’t wait to get back to the office!) What will I wear? No, seriously. I walked into my closet over the weekend and broke into hysterics upon seeing my work wardrobe. I think I have more pajamas than I do casual clothes (and I refuse to venture out of the house, on purpose, in my pajamas). So, I wore yoga pants, and went to the gym twice in the past two days-- this coming from someone who only set foot in the gym twice all of last year. It’s something that I CAN control at this point so I’m relishing it.
      The loss of a job feels like a death- and I’ve gone through most of the stages of grieving over it, not in order and I'm sure I'm not done with it. It is extremely personal. A part of me is gone now and I’m not sure what to do. I’ve started with a very lofty to-do list- things that I’ve always wanted to get ‘around to,’ organizing the CD collection (seriously- I want them all on iTunes so I can pitch the clutter), watching 68 64 episodes of “The Closer” on my DVR; you know, really important things.
        I’ve done most of the work to get ahead of this- my resume is so polished (so explain, why isn’t anyone calling!?) as is my LinkedIn profile, I’ve already applied for unemployment insurance (this will be interesting!) and I’m starting to network. I very much want to take my wonderful husband’s advice and try to enjoy this time, it’s just weird. Not having to go in to an office on any given week day. That’s one thing on my list though- organizing my office- creating an organized nice one to ‘commute’ to when I’m job hunting or working on my direct sales business (who knows! That’s a great focus point too- did you know that there are many women in this country who make six figures work in direct sales?- watch me!) There will be good days- those packed with enough errands and appointments to keep me busy; and then those days where the thought of my ‘former’ life will bring me to instant tears. Many benefits of being out of work- less money for gas or lunches on the go, dealing with commuter traffic, dry cleaning bills, great coffee from my Keurig; and then the downfall- my boss is super demanding- but when she throws those grubby little hands around my neck and says, “I love you Mommy!” it brings me back to reality and I take a deep breath and think that this might be the best job ever.

Day 24

     It’s been 24 days. A very, very long month. I’m still having the hardest time processing that my Mom is in the hospital- and then it hits me. I’m driving to pick up my daughter and tell the hands-free to “Call Mom,” and then hit the cancel button on the steering wheel just as quickly. It’s habit; I ALWAYS call my mom on my way home so we can share a few laughs, especially if they are over something silly that MiniLatte did last night; or vent about something going on elsewhere in my life. She can’t answer right now, she’s laying in an uncomfortable hospital bed in the ICU surrounded by wires, tubes and cords; a ventilator is helping her breathe; between three to six drugs are stabilizing her heart rate, blood pressure, pain, etc. The staff at the hospital really is amazing- they are doing everything within their power to provide support and comfort until surgery. And I mean everything- she is helpless. But I’m tired of seeing them almost more than I see my husband and daughter.
         Her heart is in really rough shape and isn’t going to get any better without open heart surgery to replace at least one valve. Unfortunately because she keeps running a fever; some days high, some days; low grade, the surgeons won’t even touch her. She has to be fever-free for a minimum of five consecutive days. Five very long days. Days in which other complications could crop up- pneumonia, MRSA, another infection and prolong yet again the procedure that she needs to recover. It’s driving me nuts.  However, this week my condition has been upgraded from survival-mode- just doing whatever the bare minimum is to get through the day- to functioning.
          I put on make-up again on Wednesday; even cooked dinner and worked a few days this week (I’ve been off of work since she was admitted to the ICU). I’ve not been much of a partner to my husband; he’s holding it together for me but it’s starting to take a toll on him as well. I have tried to focus some energy into being a Mom- my daughter adds pure joy to the end of a long and draining day. When I’m spent, she throws her little arms around my legs and says, “I miss you Mommy. You not sad anymore.” It breaks my heart with both happiness and sadness. I’m trying not to let my sorrow and stress affect her. She knows that Mommy’s Mommy is sick and in the hospital trying to get better but wants to kiss her boo boo. I tell her that I am sad because of that but she makes me happy. She’s wise beyond her 32 short months and has more empathy than I can believe.
         My step-dad today told me that he was worried about me. I am too. I worry that I won’t have the strength to get through another day of waiting. I want to take care of myself- my appetite has resumed within the past week- that might be curbed by the Zoloft though- it makes me nauseous. Yep, Zoloft.  I’m seeking a little help from my prescription-strength friends; Atavan, Zoloft and Trazodone. They were probably necessary before this extraordinarily stressful event, but even more so now that my anxiety and insomnia are through the roof. Are they working? Well, I’m resting a bit better. I haven’t had an anxiety attack in about a week; not sure if it’s because Mom is stable, or I am. The Trazodone makes me sleepy, but I still wake up at 4 a.m..  (BTW, have you ever read the entire warning label on a prescription? I think my before symptoms might have been more manageable than the side effects- crazy!) Sometimes in the morning, I remember the dreams I’m having about her; they’re realistic and make me sad. And then my sweet little girl rolls over and says, “Hi Mama,” and I feel a little better but I hope she won’t have to go through this some day.

Some Days I Dislike Being a Woman.....

...that would be about 10-12 days out of the month..... yep, almost 1/3 of the month I hate Mother Nature. For those same reasons I am blessed with a wonderful little girl (who I hope never has to suffer through PMS symptoms like I had as a teenager, nor those that are even more random now.)
     So if you haven't caught on yet, this post is going to be about my period. Probably falls under the TMI category, but since most of my faithful readers are women who might be able to relate or commiserate, I am simply whining venting.
     I remember hearing at some point during my pregnancy that my monthly cycle was going to get easier after I had a baby- lucky for them I don't remember who the source of this large red lie came from otherwise I might have to hunt them down and whack them with a tampon (unused) because the were oh so wrong. It has not been easier- quite the opposite- and also unpredictable and unbearable. I was 'normal' perhaps for a month or two post-baby and since then I've had the joy of experiencing crazy ass symptoms ranging from sometimes bi-monthly cycles to debilitating headaches, fatigue, mood swings and more. Sounds a bit like pregnancy symptoms, right? Not. Just the 'luck' of the draw I guess. And I might be going out on a limb here, but I think that it all boils down to the main reason that we had fertility issues in the first place- my progesterone. I've talked to my OB/GYN and he says that losing weight and being on birth control will help and suggested an IUD. I clearly hear what you're saying Mr. Man but you don't understand.... when you have boobs and these hips, I'll feel like you're understanding me. (Yes, I know, for the love of lattes, just change doctors... I really like Dr. V.... um, never noticed that correlation, ha ha....  I'm a bit on the sheepish side when it comes to speculum and paper gowns that trying out a new doc makes me cringe)
     I read up on the IUD and even with a copper one, I think it will still whack my system out- and have you read all those side effects? I don't need anymore help retaining/ gaining weight or with my mood swings.... and the pill, well, finding one with a dose that doesn't make me look or eat like a stoned teenager or act like a psycho bitch would be good--- it's riding out the experimental period (no pun intended) that is difficult. 
     This last cycle was about the last straw- I was so incredibly emotional with a short (is there a word that describes shorter than short) fuse that it pushed me over the edge.  Combine that with a precocious little toddler who didn't nap for two days and you can cue up the soundtrack from Psycho.... seriously, I had to lock myself in the bathroom and give myself a timeout- with a king size package of Reese's and a bottle glass of wine. At 11:30 a.m.  (just kidding, the wine was an afterthought- I will be sure to put it in the emergency stash for next month) It was unreal and unfair. I have a great little girl, my uterus has served it's purpose and it can go away now.
      And today my nose looks like Rudolph.... really? Hi, I'm fifteen. Cool, just one more little symptom that I can throw into my iPeriod app.  Yep, there's an app for that- why not? 
So I'm game for some supplements or vitamins to help, but not anymore hormone based anything--- my family will probably start locking me in the garage for five days out of the month pretty soon. At least there's a fridge and wine in there....  

Twinkle Widdle Star....

It's obvious from the "last post" date that I'm more of a 'reader' than a writer.... well, I love to write, but it's been more like grocery lists and shit for work;  not an insightful blog post fueled by caffeine. I have writer's envy of those that post regularly. My friend and blogstress extraordinaire Jen even has a schedule of daily post... girl, you are organized! And I'm feeling oh so guilty, so I thought that I would post a video to assuage my guilt.  Crap, I couldn't even post my list of reasons why I'm grateful for Lattes on National Coffee Lover's Day.... (it's surely coming, perhaps on National Deviled Egg Day....) and without further ado.... a too cute for words video of why I love, love, love being a mom:



.... and I'm not sure how Snow White got in the middle of twinkle? As for the "take the buckle off"- I rescued the straps from a defunct booster seat and it's one of her favorite toys.... amongst the 1,023 others.

A Blog Identity

LatteLovinMommy (perhaps me?) is suffering from a blog-dentity crisis. Unlike many of the blogs I peruse, I'm just a plain little Mommy-written blog without a specialty topic. I originally started this when I was pregnant and looking for a way to vent or share my experience without feeling like I was boring whomever I was talking to.  I'm a Jill of Many Trades but not a master of anything specific- that's good and bad of course. I could take the time to try to become an expert, but why try and reinvent the wheel when there's so many other blogs out there to capture readers' attention? I'm just me- trying to be the best Mommy I can to my sweet girl while maintaining a certain level of sanity in all the other areas of my life that need attention- work, my business, being a wife, maintaining friendships, being a good steward of our home and money. I'm not a natural-living parent; I love my coupons and saving money, but I'm not about to spend an extra 25 hours on top of my already busy life honing a hobby that others blog so well about already; I'm crafty, but despite my wonderful shelves of raw materials, I can't say that I've broken out the Cricut or beads in a really, really long time, and although mildly funny, I'm not slated for a stand-up show of my own anytime in the near future and thankfully, we are blessed with a healthy family and I don't have to turn to my blog to deal with the pain of having a special needs or angel child. And of course, there's only one toddler- not multiples that make my head spin just thinking about!
    So my point is kind of pointless- I want to have a wonderful blog for devoted followers (all three of you) to read, but I'm not sure where to go from here? Do you take the time to read worthy blogs about nothing in particular other than it's written by the caffeine-driven Mommy of a really cute almost-two-year-old? Is it okay to have a random, diverse blog? I still use this as an outlet and hobby and not a formal 'job;' I fear that it would be even more neglected (sniff, sniff) if I had to work on it and not wanted to. What draws you to a blog?
     I'm going to keep plugging away at my randomness- the writing keeps my mind sharp and is somewhat of a creative outlet until I can actually start MiniLatte's newborn baby book.....
Until Next Time,

Carol

Date Night Makes Me Yearn for Balance

I had a date last night. With the refrigerator. Oh the joys of being a Mommy! Seriously, I felt like I was getting acquainted again with my kitchen today after spending the last month in between vacation, holiday and birthday celebrations, work and family outtings and just being plain too tired or busy. I would say that in the last six weeks, I've probably cooked a home-cooked meal not even a dozen times. Wow.      Fortunately, as a dual-income family, we can eat out (um, IHOP, anyone?) and it doesn't completely kill our budget, but it also doesn't help it. It also doesn't help the diet even though I try to make healthy selections. What bothers me most is the amount of food that I just had to throw into the garbage from cleaning out the fridge. A bag full, and I'm talking trashcan size, not a grocery bag. I'm mad at having to throw money away for no reason other than lack of preparation..... so irritated.
     I really do try to meal plan, but then the best laid plans..... it takes a lot of time to be prepared, and I feel like that is seriously lacking right now. I'd much rather spend those four hours (if that) every evening with my daughter playing, reading or cuddling and not cooking or cleaning. Unfortunately, a maid is not in the budget and reality sets in. I have to find a better balance between all of the domestic things, the work stuff, parenting (like that ever stops) and having extra time to do other activities that I enjoy, or even fit some sleep into the equation. I'm envious of those moms that can balance all kinds of shit with one eye closed and on bedrest; or those that have multiples plus- how do they make it look so easy? By no means am I comparing myself- I'm just coveting perception!
     Fortunately for our household, I'm not in this alone as my wonderful husband puts in his fair share- especially with the laundry (he runs out of underwear first!) but I would really like to get a better grip on the things that I personally handle.... I have a few ideas in mind, so I'm going to do a little 'workstudy' over the next few weeks.... and I'll definately keep you posted, but in the meantime, I'm open to suggestions!

Love, Laughs and Caffeine,
Carol

Friends: With Kids/ Without Kids- Random Thoughts

While driving into work this morning, I experienced one of those rare occasions where I listened to 'regular radio' as opposed to my XM (love it!) and the morning people from one of the local stations were discussing friends. Particularly having friends of the opposite familial status (childless with parental friends and vice versa) and why it is so difficult to maintain relationships and hang out with them. The discussion got me thinking- even though I turned off the station after they interrupted the debate with a stupid song by Kesha. She bugs me. But I digress....
    I started thinking about my friends that I hang out on a regular basis and came to the conclusion that I don't. Hang out that is, I have lots of friends, but for various reasons. "Hanging out" is just much harder to do when you add motherhood to the other obligations in your life.
    I have 'work' friends. I have longtime friends- near and far- that I can call on anytime day or night to vent, bitch to, complain and can count on in a pinch. And then I have friends who came into my life because I have Little Miss K. I've met them through my local consignment sales that I volunteer for- wouldn't have met them if I was kid-less; same goes with the mom's group that I used to belong to. I have a handful of friends from high school and college, some from my direct sales business and some from random places that we met and struck up a conversation.
    The point is that I shared something in common with each friend at the certain time that we met and fostered a friendship. It may or may not have been because of children, but because of school, work, a hobby or..... whatever.  There was a common denominator in the relationship.  Am I still friends with everyone that I've ever met? Not so much, but not because I have kids. They may or may not, but we've lost touch for a host of random reasons- but I can't think of one friendship that has faded because I have a child. I can however, think of the many more that I have made because of my child.
    At this point in my life I prefer to have low maintenance friends- I've always tried to avoid drama, but even more so now that I don't want to involve Little K in said drama. I also don't have time for bullshit. I also may not have time to talk to you for weeks on end, but that doesn't mean I don't adore you. I work full time, I'm a business owner, I enjoy a small number of hobbies, I'm a wife, I'm a... you get the picture? It's hard enough to find time to have dinner with my dad, get a mani/pedi or to even just sleep, so to go out clubbin' with single, childless friends is just at the bottom of my list. Not the person, but the activity. If you want to come over and have something that resembles dinner with my family, c'mon over we're happy to have you and I may even serve you an overpriced drink in the process (cover charge will be waived).
     Now will I befriend you if you are kid-less? Maybe, maybe not. I'm not judging you but I think it will just be harder for you to understand what my life is like and I, in turn, will always think- 'just wait!' If we have enough in common outside of K, we'll probably be fast friends.  I made the decision to have K, and she is my life- friends or no friends. It's a package deal now, and most activities will be centered around her unless it's a very rare Mommy night out... hopefully! Happy Friday!

Is Parenting a Competitive Sport?

Why do people think that because they do said "insert blah blah" here that they are better parents that you? Can you tell me exactly when "Parenting" became a competitive sport? I'm sure that you've been the object of (dis)approval at one time or another from a observing spectator, er, parent.  And with the amount of skill, finesse and even teamwork required to raise a child, it really should be considered a sport.
  The competition started when I first began announcing that I was pregnant (wow, over two years ago!) with random questions ranging from if I was going to breastfeed to how long I was planning to stay at home.  I didn't consider those questions to be judgemental then, but in retrospect, the rebuttal from the interviewee is what tweaked me. Was I irked because I had no confidence as a new mom? Perhaps. But now as a veteran (ha!) mom of a busy 18 month old, I see those same questions as judgement or a way to rack up points for their 'team.'  Just because I was doing something that was different than what they did, it was wrong. Does everyone on the planet take their coffee the same? Of course not- there is not one cookie-cutter choice for everyone.
  "Oh, you're not going to breastfeed? Your baby *needs* breast milk to thrive!" Actually, she needed nourishment and milk period to thrive. Where it comes from was purely my choice. There are all kinds of organizations from the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP), the American Medical Association (AMA) and even the World Health Organization (WHO) that recommend breastfeeding, but also recognize- and don't chastise- that this isn't going to work for every Mommy for a multitude of reasons. Mine was because of a personal comfort level, I was going to return to work and didn't want to have to pump and I wanted to be able to eat and drink the same as I did pre-pregnancy. (Go ahead, call me selfish, or whatever you want.... I'm so over it.) Formula would be a black market item if it were a required part of parenting. As far as thriving, Little K just had her 18-month check up with glowing remarks; the same as all of her well-baby visits where she was above the 70th percentile with her measurements. I'm also aware that studies have shown that breastfed babies have better immune systems, but aside from a minor cold every once in awhile; she is the picture of health.
  "Good moms breastfeed. It will be harder to bond with your child if you don't." I am a good mom; I know that because Little K shouts my name with excitement and glee every time she sees me. I was also able to share bonding with Jason; and her grandparents and our wonderful extended family also had prime opportunity at feedings to build a relationship with her. Furthermore, I feel that these opportunities have helped with separation anxiety issues and she knows that our family can provide for her needs whether it's from Mommy, Daddy, "Mammas" or BopPop or her many Aunties.
  "Are you going to return to work?" This was the interesting one and divides a nation. In fact, I remember even seeing an Oprah episode on it a loooong time ago about the two camps. I was always planning on returning to work- I love my job; we need two incomes and for me, working outside the home is what makes me feel fulfilled and complete.  I feel that I am a better mom because of it. This choice works very well for our family. We are also so very fortunate that our daycare situation is primarily K's grandparents or a very close family friend; I know that she is in great hands while I'm off at work. Can you believe that I was even shunned from a "Mom's Group" because of this? Yes, those judgemental beyotches were quite appalled that I was planning on being a 'working mom'- please note the dramatic air quotes that accompany this stereotype. Like crack mom, only worse....
   And now there are lots of questions about how Jason and I actually parent her. I take most of these with a grain of salt and do consider the source. Or turn around and ask why they want to know- if it is from a soon-to-be parent, I know it's curiosity; if it's from an 'outsider looking in,' I know it's probably well-meaning but I don't feel like explaining and instead let them do all the talking as that's what they wanted in the first place- to tell you what their experiences were like. She's clean, healthy and well fed; furthermore, she is also sweet, affectionate and extraordinarily happy- and in the game of parenting that's worth more that a World Series pennant, the Super Bowl Trophy,  a Stanley Cup or a gold medal.

Will You Be My Anti-Valentine?

I'm going to freely admit that today is not one of my favorite 'holidays' of the year. And by holiday I mean that in the sense that it has earned its own printed day on the calendar, not a day free from work. It has weaseled it's way into our lives commercially, setting up false expectations forcing people to purchase gifts simply because the masses do and it's socially unacceptable to buck the trend. In this case, you’ll be a cheap, forgetful bastard/ beyotch sleeping in the other room if you boycott February 14th and forget to bring ‘everybody’ else in on the plan.
   I'm not a hater of all things red and heart shaped, I just take slight to commercialism (now as for pink and heart-shaped, that's an entirely different story!).  Take for example; my poor mom was in a fit because she couldn't afford to get K something for Valentine's Day. (Now Mom, you've seen her playroom and nursery- do you really think that she wants for much?) So she baked us cute little cookies with fluffy sugary frosting- yummy and quite perfect. Those are going to be one of the best presents ever. Besides I bought her a boose (K's word for balloon) and said it was from Mammas BB.
    My dislike of the V-Day goes way back to even grade school. Third, fourth and fifth grade kids are just plain mean- and even more so if you happen to be smart and have red hair. I despised the parties and knowing that I was going to get less stupid cartoon cards..... my mommy was smart and instilled in me values of acceptance and fairness and made me give one to all of the little kids- even the ones that picked their noses. To this day I shudder when I see boxes of kiddie Valentines! (Hope that passes before K hits preschool!)  More so, I also always hated seeing my mom unhappy because her then-husband was selfish and never showered her with flowers and fluffy animals or candy. The lack of effort was appalling- not even a card. (The bare minimum!)
    In high school my dislike grew- not because I didn’t have boyfriends to bestow upon me the commercial treats, but because I hated all of the catty one-upmanship of the next day. Um, yeah, I know that you got two dozen roses and I just got three single roses but your boyfriend also was seen getting friendly with Olga just two days ago- yep, that’s true love! I know a handful of people who are still originally together since high school (the rest have swapped!) and I give them props- Valentine’s Day or not! I just found that instead of it making you all lovey and sentimental, it instead made you feel quite the opposite.
     And in college…. I wrote an editorial for my Junior College paper about how wrong it is for the commercial world to make you feel like crap because you’re single. At the time I was newly separated and my beloved Dalmatian was my Valentine- we dined on McD’s cheeseburgers and Boone’s Farm- obviously memorable even that long ago. Fifteen years ago that was progressive- now it’s just called anti-valentinism and is a great reason to go to the bar with your friends and celebrate Sex-in-the-City style.
     It's just a date on the calendar, much like January or June 14th- the world doesn't stop because cupid is amongst us.  Trust me, he wasn't at either of the funerals that I've been to in recent years on....yep, February 14th.....
     Consider if Hallmark created cards in the true origination of the day: A Roman priest- Saint Valentine- whom secretly married couples despite Claudius II’s outlawing marriage (Hmm… sounds like a current event) was condemned and beaten to death with clubs and beheaded. He suffered martyrdom on the 14th day of February, 270AD. Those would be lovely graphics, wouldn’t they?

PERMA-VALENTINE!!!

     Our family isn’t entirely boycotting the day- I received a sweet text message this morning and we purchased together a beautiful dozen roses partly because they were part of a Safeway promotion; little Miss K got two Valentine- hemed boose’s from the $ store and there will be cards exchanged but no over-the-top gifts. I’d rather have those for no reason at all. We usually don’t do dinner out either as pricey boring menus with sub par service isn't worth celbrating (thanks anyways Leah for the offer to watch K- much appreciated!) but there’s an IHOP BOGO coupon out today that is mighty appealing. But I’m actually looking forward a Valentine’s family-style: cooking the cranberry pork chops together from the cookbook that J gave to me as a special, heartfelt Christmas present and enjoying a glass of red wine with a chick-flick after our very best forever-Valentine goes to bed.

TGIF- Yes, I am Thankful:

I really wish that I would have really understood what all of my more experienced mom friends meant when they said that it would go by fast.  I had no clue.  Really- one day I'm in labor and the next she's running (not walking) around saying "Haaa-ppeee" and "Up, up" and watching everything that we do like a little hawk to learn, learn, learn.  At nearly 15  months, Kiera is a veritable sponge- for further proof- see below at her saying 'trick or treat'- I only said it a few times..... I'm amazed when I watch her figure out how to do something on her own at the sheer brilliance of such a little person.  It makes me shake my head; it makes me shed a tear and appreciate that we were blessed with an amazing little girl.  I'm so thankful to be Kiera's Mommy.....

Are You Freakin' Insane?

I think its official- I've lost it.  Thinking that I could singlehandedly pull off a First Birthday Party Blowout could've been one of my wackiest ideas ever.  So what's the big deal?  It's just a party. For a One Year Old.  Yes, but we have 65 people coming (only 21 children!)- it's almost as large as our wedding although thankfully not as expensive- yet.  (Just kidding, honey)  And I'm a corporate events planner.  It's a cinch planning a medical conference for 200 people, or an awards luncheon for 700;  however it gets mighty interesting when it's for your own little one and you want everything to be perfect. 

The invites were handmade (I just couldn't seem to find a commercial butterfly-themed one that I liked) and sent weeks ago; it was exciting to get the first non-family RSVP (they really like us!) and then I watched the list grow, and grow.  Don't get me wrong, I'm so happy that there are going to be so many people sharing in such a wonderful occasion for little Kiera.  It means alot to us.  It also means that the house has to be in tip-top shape, digging up enough seating and tables for everyone, and trying to NOT go overboard with the menu or the budget.

We're now at T-minus 31 hours until the big shindig; last night before bed I decided to glance at the "to-do" list one more time and had a coronary that I wasn't going to get it all done.  I popped a few Motrin (should've been a Valium) and decided to get to work- washing baseboards, sweeping- redecorating. REDECORATING???!!!  At 12:30 a.m. my insane twin decided that my house wasn't up to par and decided to re-hang and accessorize and move stuff around.  The list said: "Hang Kiera's Frame" not repaint the candle holders, et cetera.  I did get all of the blinds dusted, the cobwebs down, fixtures dusted though.  It was just accomplished on the Type-A side.

Who does this for a birthday party?  I Googled it and found out that I'm the norm and really NOT insane, just a bit of a Martha when it comes to entertaining.  (Don't worry, I am using disposables, but the all had to match and although it is burgers and 'dogs, I want to make sure they are super tasty.)  So, I'm off to go bake a cake, finish cleaning, wrap presents, get the guest room ready for mom and have a stiff drink.  Kahlua in the latte at 8:30 a.m. isn't frowned upon in some parts of the world........

Nature.... Nurture.... Bad Genetics?

I'm a small town girl turned coupon-clippin', bargain shopping, latte-sippin' yuppie; what I would call the best of both worlds.  Although I grew up in a blink-and-you-miss-it California town that didn't have much diversity, I 'summered' with my dad in Sacramento and was able to experience other cultures.  I wasn't sheltered, just was fortunate to live in small town where we didn't lock our doors at night or some even left their keys in the vehicle ignitions.  That changed when I was preparing to move for college:  I came over to do my matriculation and was going to meet dad for lunch.  I somehow got on the wrong freeway and while sitting at a gas station trying to get my bearings, I was mugged.  In broad daylight.  At knifepoint.  The creep didn't get more than $20, but also took my 'new' ring- a family heirloom that was a graduation present.  It was a horrible experience, however, I've never gotten lost since (and that was pre-GPS, peoples!) and it certainly heightend my sense about trusting anyone.   I still prefer to think that 80% of the population is generally good; but now that I'm a Mommy, it's much harder for me to grant people the benefit of the doubt.  I have my family to think about and I have no qualms about being critical now.  Had I really paid attention to my prickling hair when the mugger was approaching my car, I would have rolled up my window and possibly not have gotten mugged.  Perhaps.  I pay attention to the bat senses much more now. 

And I also have started to pay attention to things that, in the past, I would have waived off pre-Kiera.  I've always been a pretty open-minded liberal individual; just now I wonder what happened to the other 20% of the population that either makes a public spectacle of themselves or are plainly just bad individuals.  What sets them off?  Experiencing a bad childhood?  Bad parenting?  Bad role models?  Or just bad genetics?  And how do I sit down with my sweet little girl in five years and try to explain to her that sometimes the world just sucks? 

How do I show her that the train-wreck that is Lindsay Lohan will not ever be cool or a good role model- can you believe that she is the same cute little girl from Parent Trap?  I shudder to think where her train derailed; in this case I'm assuming that it was from irresponsible parenting and more concern about their gravy train rather than raising a normal child.  Ugh.  At least I have a very good basis for how I do NOT want my child to turn out. 

I could go on with other celebrities: Britney Spears, once a hot mess (but not as bad as Lohan IMO); struck gold at a young age and was forced to grow up too fast.  Her dad seems to have it dialed in, but Brit created her own Circus, hit rock bottom and has made an impressive comeback; thanks in part to good parenting. 

And although I like this teenager's dad since his "Achy Breaky" days, little Miley Cyrus needs a serious spanking.   I came across her live performance on Dancing with the Stars while channel surfing and had that united parental thought, "if that were my daughter..."  In full disclosure, I have to admit that I like the song but not the outfit and performance by the 17-year old....  I hope that Billy Ray tries to at least remember that she could be a good role model as long as they keep her 'tamed' until she's older- and no, not just 18; into her 20's.... now Beyonce (and even Justin Timberlake... every time I hear that song I think of the SNL parody and laugh) rocked the black onesie, but Miley.... not so much, it seemed like a little girl trying to be an adult too fast.

See what I mean?  I probably wouldn't have thought twice about something like this before I became a mom, it's just now....... hmmm.  Seriously. I'm not even really judgemental or catty; I just want to have a good environment and positive, normal role models for baby girl to experience.  Like Taylor Swift.... or even Drew Barrymore- a childhood star that started on the left path, but straightened her life out and rocks it now.  Although it sucks that I even have to show her good egg and bad egg analogies and teach her about stranger danger, it is my job as a parent.... I hoped and prayed and chose to have her and must be diligent in my lifelong job of raising a good person, a positive role model and productive citizen.... nature- nurture- genetics- whatever- with good parenting, it should all turn out good in the end.

New Year's Resolution

It’s January 5th and I still haven’t set any resolutions for 2010. So, I’m a slacker- my lovely Christmas Cards are still sitting in my computer bag anxiously waiting to be mailed… at least the letter admitted that they would be late! Who am I kidding- I can’t remember one single year that I actually kept any resolutions that I did make and that was when life was so much simpler!!! I can’t imagine that now- with a full-time job, a direct sales business, a new family, hobbies and such- that I would be any more successful at keeping said resolutions.


Maybe I’ll quit smoking…. DONE. (Is that cheating considering that I don’t smoke?)


Okay, I’m going to not eat chicken anymore…. DONE. (Developed a strong aversion to chicken while I was pregnant and it still stands….)

In all seriousness, I could resolve to lose weight, better manage our money, volunteer for charity, reduce stress, get organized or all of the above, but it doesn’t mean jack if I really don’t want to do it. Not to mention I have to formulate a plan with measurable goals and be intentional about achieving those goals. It’s too much effort right now and some days I’m just lucky to have on appropriate and matching shoes (seriously- in the first week back to work from maternity leave, I left the house still wearing my slippers the first day, and the next I had on two different black boots….See?).

I do want to improve my life.  For example, getting healthy is a good start- both so that I can go shopping in a store that doesn’t carry fluffy sizes and also so that I can play and romp and run with my daughter without panting. As she has yet to master turning over, I have some wiggle room to achieve this goal. I don’t, however, want to go on a "diet" as you can’t maintain them long term and the thought of not being able to have (hey, I just brushed my teeth and am trying not to make a midnite dash to the kitchen….) if I so please makes me then want to eat the whole package. (Although, it’s my dear honey that you would catch eating out of the carton rather than me!) We did the South Beach Diet about six years ago when “low carb” was the big rage (for the second time) and it was successful in helping us to lose the weight, but somehow mashed 'faux-tatoes' just didn’t do it for me as I’m a fiend stalker fan of the carbs. The low carb diet makes me constantly think about food and my mental soundrack is straight Forrest Gump… ice cream sundae gumbo, peppermint mocha cocktail, cinnamon crunch bagel fettucine… (no shrimp, I’m allergic!). I do better just trying to lower the carb intake and eat more fruits and veggies (speaking of, my Farm Fresh to You Produce Box will be here tomorrow- yay!). I ate healthy today, and drank so much water that I’m hoping that the bathroom trips can count against my activity points??? One day at a time- this might only last until Donut Saturday! Another problem that I have to admit is that I am severely allergic to exercise. It makes me short of breath…. Er, yeah. Its not that I don’t like to exercise, its that I prefer so many other things, like root canals. And I get so self-conscious in the gym…. I should resolve to get over that. Thank goodness that donation that I've been making to the gym is tax deductible.....


And why should I set a resolution just because it’s the new Year? Every new Day is a good reason to start over…. So is having a wonderful little daughter to live for, and to be quite honest she is my only resolution this year. To be the best mother that I can be to her. If I have to get more organized (I’m super organized at work, not as much at home)to spend more quality time with her, I will; eat healthy to set a good example, I will (I will not try the strained peas though); if I have to keep clippin’ coupons to pad our budget so that she can be the best dressed baby on the block, so be it. It will all be done for her. And it will also be the one year that I maintain a resolution!!!!

Terrific Tuesday 12/29

If I only end up blogging on Tuesdays next year, at least there will be 52 regular posts- however, there will also be many milestones that Kiera will pass in the upcoming year so, that will add on another 12 or so.... phew, that makes me tired just thinking about it!  ( :

It's been a very loooooong week filled with ups and downs and everything else that holidays usually bring on; and I survived to blog about it yet another day.  I had high, high hopes about doing a Christmas day post about how Merry and Wonderul it is and to have a great day, but it was hectic enough without adding one more thing to the list!

On to another list: Terrific Tuesday
1) Baby Giggles:  is there not anything sweeter than hearing a small child laugh because of sheer joy?  We got to hear Kiera really giggle for the first time on Christmas Morning- talk about a great present!  *sniff, sniff*  She's been laughing for a while, but mostly just a little "heh, heh," and not one of those ear-to-ear belly laughs.  Don't know what it is about that fuzzy, wuzzy changing pad that she so loves!
2) Gift Cards:  So I'm not one of those that thinks that gift cards are the "easy way" to give gifts- I love them!  This coming from someone who had to do baby shower gift returns... gift cards are great, especially for post-holiday shopping at great sales; they don't require a gift reciept and better than cash, they can't be spent on bills.  If they are to a store that you know that the recipient actually shops at and loves, then more power to the giver.  (Trust me, I was thanking my dad and dear hubby when I only had to spend less than $10 out of pocket for a $80+ transaction at Bath & Body Works semi-annual sale on Sunday!)
3) Pedicures: when you're having a stressful week, there's nothing like a pedi/ mani with little sparkly designs, especially when you get to do so with a girlfriend or, in this case, your mom.  Even better?  Mom footed (ha, ha) the bill!
4) Vacation Days:  God bless paid vacation days!   Better yet- are paid vacation days in conjunction with paid holidays.... more quality time to spend with my wonderful little girl!
5) Fuzzy Socks:  No, I'm not lacking for something terrific- I think that there is something so cozy about slipping on a pair of soft-as-can-be socks after a long day!  That's why my drawer is overflowing with them (oh, honey don't get me started on the pajamas....)

and 5a) Holy increased blog traffic batman- I'm so excited about more traffic on here- thank you for taking the time out of your busy day to peer in our life. I hope that you'll come back soon!  ( :

It's Terrific Tuesday!

I really, really need to make "blogging- regularly, religiously" part of my 2010 resolution....  I guess I just have to get over the thought that each post has to be something completely thought provoking or profound.  I mean, the title does say RANDOM, right???  I can't tell you how many posts that I have that are half written and never make it up because they aren't deep enough.... whatever..... do you know how many blogs I keep returning to because they are entertaining and not just philosphical???  (Okay, Socrates....)
So, in early preparation for the resolution: Terrific Tuesday is going to be something that I'm thankful for/ is totally cute (um, what's NOT cute about Kiera!!!)/ helpful to other people (do other people other than Jason, Kindle and Jennifer actually read this??? I would hope so! HA!) or I just really need to share:

So, here goes my first Terrific Tuesday post:
1) (Formerly) Pregnant Chick's Mommy is on the way over here for Christmas!  YAY!  Please, please white, fluffy snow let her over the pass....
2) I'm almost done decorating for Christmas (um, yeah, that's another entirely different post!)- just have to get some candles to set out and "wrap" the picture frames!
3) I've found regular daycare for Kiera- it's a stay-at-home-mom friend of mine and Jason and I are both so thrilled.  She could use the money, we want someone awesome watching Kiera on the non-Daddy days and if you can't trust another mom, then whom??? She comes highly recommended by another friend who used her for her first baby.  YAY!
4) Kiera is religiously sleeping through the night now!  BIG YAY- that's if she gets her last bottle around 11ish... thank you patron saint of 6+ consecutive hours of sleep!
and 5) How can your day NOT be perfect when this is what you get to come home to???:

I just have to say that I HEART my iPhone

for endless hours of productivity and entertainment

and of course an at-hand opportunity to snap

limitless photos of sweet baby! 

And now a FREE Photoshop App? 

How cool- it's very basic, but fun none-the-less. 

Here's some random photos to kick off a

wonderful holiday season:

Warhol-esqe Baby Kiera:

A totally handsome tech guy and a cute little girl: chalk art style:

Artsy Baby (Blur Vignette Saturation w/ Border)